A Life Prayer

It has been too long and anyone reading still - thank you. Well, as expected, my life keeps on swirling with new unanticipated events - 2 weeks ago a severe downside where negative things in my personality showed up - in a survivor mechanism disguise - I want to, but can't blame head injury on these things... thanks to some supportive friends, I am getting through this by ceasing the negative aspects... except poor Gareth is being overwhelmed by my depression that past monsters made the unwelcome return and were brought to my attention and, even though gone now, they stirred up concerns and increased my paranoia immensely - now it feels like anyone can be out to get me. The phrase "adding insult to injury" has taken on a new meaning - I managed injury by breaking my neck, C2 and C7, and occluded arteries that supply my brain with O2, and paralyzed my left side, I managed to cover the injury with one that is absolutely the worst experience - no awful life ending illness but a life sparing hell - a life of torture that doesn't seem to be ending - and recent events have added insult after insult to the injury - Compassion - it is challenging in this day and age - but giving compassion comes back to you. My apology and my favorite - yes high school, love poem from a book called Life prayers to my love

I will fight this and my life will be strong again.
Gareth:

I love you,
Not only for what you are,
But for what I am
When I am with you.

I love you,
Not only for what
You have made of yourself,
But for what
You are making of me.

I love you
For the part of me
That you bring out;
I love you
for putting your hand
Into my heaped-up heart
And passing over
All the foolish, weak things
That you can't help
Dimly seeing there,
And for drawing out
Into the light
All the beautiful belongings
That no one else had looked
Quite far enough to find.

I love you because you
Are helping me to make
Of the lumber of my life
Not a tavern
But a temple;
Of my every day
Not a reproach
But a song.

I love you
Because you have done
More than any creed
Could have done
To make me good,
And more than any fate
Could have done
To make me happy.

You have done it
Without a touch,
Without a word,
Without a sign.
You have done it
By being yourself.
Perhaps that is what
Being my best friend means,
After all.

- R. Croft


Thank you my love...
M