The title of a nice tune by an old friend. There is another old tune he covered called "A House is Not a Home". Such was the feeling on my two initial trips back to Dolores. The first, a week before Christmas, gave me the chance to reground myself at work. Each night I would come home to a house, so well taken care of by friends in our absence but still woefully vacant with remnants of our vacation departure scattered about. Marilyn's silent belongings, untouched and unmoved by her in so long pondered the fine line between a box in the attic and the hand of their owner.
The second trip followed Marilyn's discharge from inpatient and transition to outpatient at Craig. My parent's home allowed her a "soft launch" into the real world as she refined her healing with yet another team of superb therapists. This time the dogs came back and we roamed the house as a trio, unsettled and incomplete.
At last we are all here and the house is becoming a home again. Marilyn has "settled in" with a vengeance. On her first day home she tore apart bookshelves, delved deeply into her "very-hard-to-walk-in" closet, took a shower, made lunch, played with the dogs, threw on her Sorels and walked to the end of the block and finally went to bed at 11pm. All this from someone who by all TBI professional accounts should have been overwhelmed and exhausted by the return home.
There are many times that the weight of all that has happened and all that lies ahead threatens to crush me. More often than not that is when Marilyn rescues me. She tells me she is eager to see everyone again, she will dance again, she will see single vision again, her mind and wit will be sharp as a diamond again, she will return to her patients again, she will hike for miles again and stand atop a high peak smiling (after insisting that she could never make it) - again. I don't mind waiting.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
7 comments:
Gareth - Your words are like poetry. The passion you hold for life and for Marilyn is incredible. Continue to believe in yours & Mar's inner strength and the close bond between you.
Love, Jen Espinosa
Dear Gareth and Marilyn,
Well you've done it again...Michael and I both have tears in our eyes and most definitely that lump in the throat. We so rarely read love stories these days....thankyou again for sharing yours wtih such eloquence and honesty that we once again feel our story lift up and begin dancing along side. We are celebrating 28 amazing years together this year. To paraphrase A. Miller and many others: "Love bats last!" Barb and Michael
Hey you two! Bless your hearts. I'm all teary, too. Keep your heads up, you're amazing.
Hope your dance card isn't so full that you're taking walks and getting rides from troupes instead of individuals, but put me on the list, too!
Love,
Sujan
Hi Gareth and Marilyn!
Firstly, WELCOME HOME!!! The hood has not been the same without you! And, thanks so much to both of you for sharing your journey with us all. It has and will be challenging and rewarding and all those things that life just is, and allowing us to glimpse a part of your experiences in such a genuine, open and loving way is such a gift to your community. We are all so glad you are back! Yeah!! You both inspire us!
Call when you want to go for a walk Marilyn!
Tracy
Hey Marilyn,
I'm up for a walk. How about next Tuesday morning, 5th February, at 8:30 or 9:00? Will that work for you?
I don't know how to get in touch with you. My home phone is 562-4477, e-mail is cmcafee@fone.net.
Chuck
Ditto, ditto, ditto,
Your last entry leaves me teary eyed, with a lump in my throat and as ever awe struck by the grace that the two have you have shown throughout this journey. Welcome home. I look forward to hiking miles, dancing, and celebrating life with you both into the future. Thank you for giving us a perspective on what important and worth cherishing in life! Love, Alex
Gareth and Marilyn, Happy homecoming! Just want you both to know that I think of you often and as we all have been, I have been transformed in a special way by my experience with you both during Marilyn's recovery. I am eager to see you both again and think often of my day with Marilyn. Among other things it was a day of tenacity (on Marilyn's part), physically, emotionally, everyally you can think of - she was constantly striving, physically working and smiling during most of it. Gareth it doesn't surprise me that Marilyn helps you get through this too, as you have helped her get through. I was humbled by Marilyn's generousity in letting me share the day and I'm cheering loudly from Lakewood for each new day of healing. On that note, I'm going to get my self out for a walk! Enjoy the beauty of Delores! Love, Teresa Hegyi
Post a Comment