I just finished 'Over My Head' by Dr. Claudia L. Osborn, recommended to me by Marilyn's friend, Melissa. (Easy to find on Amazon.com) It tells the story of a Physicians struggles following a traumatic brain injury resulting from a bike accident. While her recovery journey was much different than Marilyn's appears to be, this book does an extraordinary job of describing what is going on from the point of view of the brain injured person. The perspective on being a medical professional with TBI is especially poignant. Reading it was often excruciating for me in the midst of Marilyn's early recovery and because it describes so many challenges on the cognitive front - many of which Marilyn thankfully seems to be bypassing and many of which she has yet to confront. This book has helped me come to terms with the fact that this accident will net a changed, but not lesser Marilyn. (No more waiting for the "old" Marilyn to come back.) That change may be less evident externally as time goes by but that change will be very evident for her. To be clear - when I say change, I mean change as in all we experience in life produces change. Profound experiences or events produce profound change. So, I urge you to read this book (or about TBI in general), particularly those of you who will be around her when she returns to Dolores.
On another note - Marilyn insisted on and successfully folded her clothes Sunday night before I left for the week.
“The determination to win is the better part of winning.”~Daisaku Ikeda
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8 comments:
Yes Gareth! Profound experiences/events do indeed produce profound change. I'm sure even those of us who have not suffered a head injury can relate. And life keeps moving forward and continues to be rich and full and more enlightened as will yours and Marilyns.
We love you both!
Thanks, Gareth, for the recommendation--I'll put it on my wish list. And thanks for keeping us grounded on what to expect as Mar moves forward.
Mar, I'm glad that your determination seems to be unfaltered as you fold your clothes and takes on each of life's little (little being a relative term here) challenges.
I hope your first week without Gareth is going well. Watch for a little something in the mail (hopefully arriving before Xmas). Eric and Eddie say HI!!!
Peace, Ali
I dont' know if you guys remember us, but we were friends in Chinle. I was saddened to hear of your accident, but as I read the blog(which I'm so happy you are doing) I realize you are facing this challenge with determination and optimism. I'll look forward to reading more and following your progress. I know you will be the active person you were before the accident. Best wishes, Alice, Ben, Ethan and Julian(born after Chinle).
Thanks for the recommended reading Gareth, I would like to read it to better understand what Marilyn is going through and how we might be able to better support her.
I'm looking forward to Marilyn's return to Dolores. Please let us know how we can help you guys with this transition, with meals, rides, visits etc. I'm sure there will be challenges. I just want you both to know that you have a lot of support here. So if there is anything we can do to help, please don't hesitate to ask.
I hope you guys have a great holiday with Gareth's parents. We will be thinking of you lots!
Love, Alex
I talked with Mar last night, and heard lots of good news--she's walking with just a cane, and getting stronger each day. A recent CT shows that her blood vessels in her neck are healed, which means blood is flowing well to the brain again. She will probably get the neck brace off when she is checked out (now Monday, Jan 7 when her doctor's back from vacation). There are some short-term memory issues (difficulties keeping up with current events and remembering what she's said to whom--sad to say, I have similar issues :-) and her left knee locks a bit, which signals an alignment issue when she's walking.
As Mar chatted on about this and that, I smiled to think that only 2 months before it was me rambling on the phone to her when she was unable to talk yet. My, how times have changed. If you haven't talked with Mar recently, her voice is pretty much back to normal, with intonation and all.
And just one month ago, Mar was not too excited about being away from home for the holidays, but last night, she talked about how festive the hospital was, and that she realized how important it was that Craig foster the holiday spirit. It seems they are doing a good job of lifting Mar's and everyone's spirits.
Her goal a few weeks ago was to spend Christmas day with Gareth's family sans wheelchair, and I am so excited she's getting her wish!
Mar, as I and so many others have told you, your determination and courage and leading you through your recovery! And Gareth, your constant support and encouragement is incredible, to say the least.
One last thing, Mar was bummed that she was not able to send any cards or gifts to friends, but I said, and I think everyone will agree, that this year, Marilyn's presence is all of our gift!!
This year we are thankful for Mar and Gareth!
Love, Alison, Eric, and Eddie
Hi Mari and Gareth,
Dad and I want to wish you a Merry Christmas and so happy to hear you are walking and talking more. I want to thank you for the beautiful book of Colorado flowers.
Glad to hear you are spending Christmas with Gareth’s parents. Wish them a Merry Christmas and a very Happy New Year from us.
Love you both,
Mom & Dad
any more posts coming ?
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